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The New Normal

5/26/2020

 
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When this lockdown started it felt like all forms of media exploded with suggestions for what we could do to fill the days. Online tutorials sprang up with instructions for baking the definitive banana bread, fitness workouts, ballet classes, yoga and endless quizzes. All designed to fill in the hours at home that were leftover after home schooling or queuing for food. 
 
Most of us are focussed on the key questions ‘when will this end?’ and ‘when can we get back to normal?’
 
We can none of us know what everything is going to look like after lockdown but it’s likely that things won’t be what they were before for some time to come. 
 
What this time at home offers us is a unique chance to re-think how we live and maybe to STOP for ever those messages we give ourselves all the time about not being enough exactly as we are.
 
Every January I write about how important it is that we don’t beat ourselves up about those enormous changes that we tell ourselves we absolutely must make but, if a family quiz via Zoom wasn’t your thing before lockdown and if you would normally do anything to avoid online yoga or pilates, these aren’t going to be attractive propositions now.

Maybe some of us will come out of lockdown with new found cooking and baking skills, increased fitness and a brand new ability to play the violin. But, I’m guessing that most of us won’t. The majority of us will simply revert to our previous habits and baking banana bread and on-line fitness sessions won’t be high on our future list of priorities.
 
Wouldn’t it be great if we could go into the future with an acceptance of ourselves and everyone else that supports us for the rest of our lives?

Don't agonise, orrganise!

Services at Orrganise are available online at this time so if you would like a chat about what is going on for you or if you would like to book a session please don’t hesitate to get in touch.
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Dear 2020, this wasn't on my vision board!

5/9/2020

 
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I saw a Facebook post the other day which said, “Dear 2020, this wasn’t on my vision board!"

I chuckled to myself when I thought of all the vision boards I’ve made over the years, how I would take careful photos of the optimistic images I’d created so that I could carry them around on my phone to remind myself of what I wanted to achieve in my home and in my life. I even ran workshops and mini-training sessions with clients to support them to make their own ideal dream board so they could too benefit from this positive technique. After all, we get more of what we focus on… don’t we? 
 
Well…yes, many times we do but sometimes, events overtake us and we are sent challenges that we have to work our way around. This present situation is nobody’s idea of a good time and it demonstrates to us all that sometimes things just happen that we can’t plan for. That doesn’t alter the fact that what we focus our attention on tends to grow. If we look for the positive elements in a situation we tend to find it. 

It is also the case that we can easily overwhelm ourselves with fear and dread if we watch every single update or news bulletin and goodness knows that there are plenty of them at the moment. The last thing I would ever want to do is dismiss genuine anxieties and concerns and I know that so many of us are missing our loved ones and sad that we can't see family and friends. There are also people who will lose loved ones and that is a terrible reality for so many. 

Throughout our lives we construct our routines around familiar people and things and surround ourselves with people and activities that we love and can rely on. For some of us that can be time with family and friends, for others it’s getting out and about and meeting people for coffee or drinks and some people thrive on regular visits to the hairdressers and presenting themselves in a way that they are comfortable with.
 
We become so used to defining ourselves by our work, by our relationships and by what we do that anything that deprives us of these things is threatening and scary.  Most of us will never have been thrown on our own resources in this way. Routines that we relied on to give our life structure and people who are precious to us seem lost, albeit temporarily, as we retreat to our caves and hope that we can all get back to what we know and value when this is over. 
 
But, what if we decided to think about all this differently and recognise the opportunity to make real changes and new decisions about how we live in the future?  
 
Sometimes, we think that what we always did is the only way to live and we try to impose control by filling up our time with as many ‘normals” as we can. We think about what we can find in the shops to feed ourselves and our families, standing patiently and not so patiently in long queues to buy toilet rolls and pasta as if those things sustained our lives.  All in a thinly disguised attempt to take control of something we can’t control. 
 
The truth is, we were never in control…at all.  It has taken this virus to show us the reality of that. But what we can influence is how we think about what happens to us. The good news is that we all have the potential to come out of this differently from how we went in. 
 
We all need to consider how best to support ourselves as we come through this situation and what and who we will be on the other side. Maybe now is the ideal time to focus on a new vision for our future. What if we decided to use this time to plan how we want our lives to look after this period is finally over? 
 
Everything passes and this will pass too, now is a golden opportunity to look again at things we do because we’ve always  done them this way and begin to make plans for the months and years ahead. 
 
Services at Orrganise are available online at this time so if you would like a chat about what is going on for you or if you would like to book a session please don’t hesitate to get in touch.
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    Francine Orr

    Offering Hypnotherapy, NLP, Coaching and Business Solutions to Individuals and Organisations Across Scotland

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